Friday, August 01, 2008

Memory


I remember as a child I liked to think I had a very good memory, like a trap. I was convinced I could remember everything. Well since I have started having children it seems my memory power has drastically decreased. I think maybe my brain became so filled up there wasn't room for much else and that I had a lot of clutter in there that got in the way to let in the new information. I wasn't sure how to clean it. I tried some yoga and stretching and meditation and prayer but I am not sure how helpful that was. I am still trying those things anyway. I don't mean to brag and say my head is full of so much knowledge that there isn't room for more. On the contrary I would love to fill it with only wise things and leave all the junk out of it but with the world the way it is and the exposure to so many types of things these days we do not always control what we see and what we hear. Perhaps I can work on what is significant and meaningful and sweep out the rest. It is funny to me how a memory can swirl around to the front and I suddenly remember some person or place or time I thought escaped me before having little recollection of previously remembering it. That may not make too much sense to the rest of you. I am really terrible at remembering things and my husband always teases me about it. I forget dates, appointments, names, where I put things, to lock the doors and have disappointed myself remembering things just a bit too late too often. A giant calendar of the whole month we made for the refrigerator is helping me as is a date book. We seem to have so many appointments and there are more than just ourselves to worry about these days that frequently I can't keep it all straight. Sometimes I show up on the wrong day at the wrong time for things but most often I am late because I just cannot get a grasp on the concept of time and I am spreading myself so thin. I came across a passage in a book I am reading that I found interesting. The book is called After Dark by Haruki Murakami and was given to me by my husband for an fourth wedding anniversary.
from page 205...
"...All of a sudden out of nowhere I can bring back things I haven't thought about for years. It's pretty interesting. Memory is so crazy! It's like we've got these drawers crammed with tons of useless stuff. Meanwhile, all the really important things we just keep forgetting, one after the other."